My Only

I decided to try my hand at a reader insert fan fic. A friend and I both did a Murphy McNully x Reader Soulmate AU fic. Here’s my attempt.

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A stillness settled over the pitch as the spectators waited with baited breath, their eyes transfixed on Madam Hooch with the Quaffle in hand.

At the sharp chirp of her whistle, she launched the Quaffle upwards.

The pitch roared to life as the players sprung into action.  A triumphant grin flashed across the Ravenclaw chaser’s face as he reached for the Quaffle only to watch in horror as it was snatched from his grasp, mere millimeters from his fingertips.  The Hufflepuff chaser streaked past him, looking back with a cheeky grin.  With a grimace he gave chase.

“Parkin is in possession of the Quaffle.  She passes to Amari.  It’s back to Parkin.  She’s lined up for the shot…a 93.68% chance of making the goal…Doyle takes the bait and is thrown off by Parkin’s feign.  Will he get there in time? NO!  Hufflepuff scores!

***

“That was incredible, wasn’t it?” chittered one of your friends excitedly.

“Honestly, Murphy’s the best quidditch commentator Hogwarts has ever had!” added the other.

“It was alright,” you grumble.

Your friends look at you quizzically, “What’s up with you?”

You shrug, “I just don’t see what all the fuss is about.  He throws in a few numbers and all of a sudden he’s the best?  It’s gonna take more than that to convince me.”

“Yeah, but he’s like calculating the probabilities of things as they happen.  Like that’s so incredibly cool that he can do those calculations so fast.”

“Sure,” you say, “I just find him so…so incredibly annoying.”

“Who’s annoying?” asked Murphy, wheeling up behind you.

Your friends exchange a look of embarrassment as you turn to face him.

“You.”

He looks at you in surprise, “What did I do?”

“You keep following me around and shouting numbers at me!  I’m so sick of it.”

“I…um, I’m sorry?  I had no idea that irritated you.  I was just breaking down the facts of the situation and having concrete –”

“Look, I don’ t care why you do it, just stop it!  And leave me alone!”

You take off as your friends look helplessly between you and Murphy.

He sighs, his head hung low as he wheels off in the opposite direction, muttering to himself.

One of your friends comes running after you, while the other follows Murphy.

“Don’t mind her, anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“You think?”

“Of course!  I mean…”

“Yes?”

“I would totally date you.”

“But what if…what if I find my soulmate and…”

“And what if we’re soulmates?”

Murphy thought about it.  The numbers didn’t add up.  There was no sign that she was the one.  He wasn’t one to want to break anyone’s heart, but clearly you weren’t interested.  Maybe this would be for the better.  Maybe by doing this, he could make you happy.

***

“Y/N, what the hell was that?”

“I’m so sick of him just following me around like a puppy just chattering on nonstop.  Like, I wish there was an off switch”

“Oh, come on!  He’s cute!”

“Yeah-“

“Wait, you think he’s cute?”

“Well, yeah, of course, I have eyes.”

“Then why were you being so mean to him?”

“For starters, at some point that face starts talking and then I just want to punch him.  Do you have any idea what it’s like to have to listen to him go on and on about something I could care less about for hours on end?  Like can he talk about something that isn’t Quidditch for once in his life?!”

“Well have you tried?”

“I…” you furrow your brows, “I guess I haven’t.”

“Well there you go.”

“Why are so insistent that I like him as much as you guys?”

“Just call it intuition or whatever, but I think you guys would make such a cute couple.”

You snort, “Friendship is one thing, being in a relationship with him is completely different.  There’s no way in hell I’d be caught dead dating him.”

“Hey!  You could do a lot worse than him.”

“That’s true, but just the thought of it…” you shiver.

“But what if you guys were meant to be?” your friend said quietly, “What if he was your soulmate?”

“Him?  Yeah right?  We get along about as well as, well, I don’t know where I was going with that…my point is we don’t get along and we never will.”

You feel a twinge.  Your irregular heartbeat seems louder than usual as you try to ignore it.

What if?

***

It didn’t take long for the entire school to know that Murphy was dating your friend, Abby.  Halls filled with whispers that would suddenly subside when they noticed you approaching.  Sympathetic looks were thrown towards your retreating back, but you could still feel their gazes, hear their pitying thoughts.

Abby took pleasure in showing off her new relationship, flaunting it to anyone who would listen about their “cute love story” as Murphy followed her around reluctantly.

Whenever you were near, he would watch you, but never say anything.  He didn’t want to be accused of annoying you anymore and if it made you happy for him to be silent, then he would.

“Y/N!” Abby called out to you, “You should totally join Murph and I for lunch.”

“Uh…thanks, but I think I’ll pass.”

“Why?  Are you suddenly saying you don’t wanna be friends just because I’m dating Murphy?  Wow, I thought you were better than that.  You were always going on and on about not dropping your friends just for a boy and now you’re just-“

“Chill out Abby.  I just missed a class and promised Professor Sprout I’d make it up over lunch today.”

“Oh…”

“I’ll catch you guys later.”

As you left, you heard your friend, Elizabeth hiss, “What the hell do you think you’re doing Abby?”

“What do you mean?  I’m just sharing my happiness.”

“You know they belong together.”

“He’s my soulmate!  If you can’t see that, maybe we shouldn’t be friends anymore.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“Everyone knows how much I love him and he’s way better off with me than Y/N.  Besides, she hates him, might as well.”

“I’m telling you…this is not right.”

Abby shrugged, “You’re just jealous that I had the guts to make the move.”

“I’m not jealous, Abby…I just think…well, never mind.  How do you know you’re soulmates?”

“They say souls recognize each other when they first meet.  Call it a feeling or whatever you want, but we’re inextricably linked.”

“Right…”

“You can’t seriously think Y/N is his soulmate, can you?  I mean, he deserves to be with someone who makes him happy and she clearly doesn’t.”

At that moment, Murphy entered the Great Hall and Abby skipped up to him happily and began chattering to him, but they fell upon deaf ears.  Though he had agreed to do this to make you happy, there was a gnawing inside telling him something was wrong.  All the while he could feel each beat of his strange heartbeat in his throat, like it was trying to tell him something.

***

Quidditch just wasn’t the same without Murphy in the commentator’s box, Wizard’s Chess wasn’t as challenging to play without Murphy trying out his new strategies, but Abby wanted to be by his side 24/7 and she couldn’t stand the thought of losing him, especially to you.  Besides, he didn’t have the drive to pursue the things he loved anymore.

Soon, the school’s sympathetic looks and sighs weren’t reserved just for you anymore.

“Man, I miss having Murphy around.”

“That Abby is ruining his life.”

“He’s miserable, I heard.”

“You think he still loves her?”

“They’re soulmates, of course he does.”

“Then why don’t they just get together?”

“Because he wants to make her happy.”

The voices swirl around you.  There is no peace, not in class, not in your dormitories, not even in sleep.

“Was this my fault?” you think.

You never meant for this to happen.  You just wanted him to leave you alone.  To give you some space and stop shouting seemingly random statistics at you.  You never meant to hurt him.

You sigh, resolved to make this right, you climb out of bed and creep downstairs.  Almost everyone has gone to bed, but you see Murphy still sitting before the fire in the common room.

“Hey, couldn’t sleep?”

Murphy looks up at you in surprise.

“Can we talk?”

“Yeah…of course.”

“The things I said…”

“Were all true.  I can be overbearing and annoying…I just…”

You shake your head, “I was wrong to say those things.  I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“No, you were probably right.  It was a matter of time before I just got on someone’s nerves.  Besides, I’m fine.  You didn’t hurt my feelings at all.”

“We both know that’s a lie.”

Before Murphy can respond, Abby comes bounding down the stairs.

“What is going on here?” she demands.

“We were just talking.  Couldn’t sleep.”

She eyes you suspiciously, “I know bullshit when I hear it.”

“I wasn’t-” you begin to say.

“She wasn’t-” Murphy says simultaneously.

“I know what you’re trying to do, Y/N.  You’re jealous!  You realize now what a catch Murph is and you want to be a part of that, but you know what, you’re too late.  We love each other and we’re going to get married and have lots and lots of children once we graduate.”

“I-” you begin, “Never mind.  Good night.”

You get up, looking back as Abby bends over Murphy.  You catch a glimmer of sadness in your eyes before you are forced to turn away to avoid seeing the disgusting things Abby is doing to him. 

You return to your room and lay down in the bed, staring at the canopy, but sleep still won’t come.  You turn and notice Elizabeth awake in her bed.

“Liz?”

“What is it?”

“I think I messed up.”

“I’ll say.”

“I…I don’t know what to do.  I…I tried to talk to him, but Abby…”

“Is so paranoid that you’re going to try to steal him away from her that she chased you away?”

“Yeah.”

“So, are you finally admitting you have feelings for him?”

“No.  I just…I didn’t mean for…well for all this to happen.  He doesn’t even commentate or play chess anymore.  Or strategize or spew his statistics or – or –”

“You hurt him really badly.”

“I never meant-“

“I know, but you did and Abby won’t let you fix it because she thinks if anyone goes near Murphy, she’s going to steal him away from her.  So, if there’s this rift between you, you guys can’t get together.”

“So, help me find a way to speak to him.  I mean, he’s got to be alone…sometime, right?”

“You’d think, but no, Abby rarely lets him out of her sight.”

“That’s not healthy.”

“No, but you know what, I think I have an idea.”

***

“Abby!  Oh my God Abby!” exclaimed Elizabeth, coming down into the common room the next morning.

“What?!  What’s going on?” Abby panicked, turning away from Murphy for a moment.

“There’s something really important I need to tell you…it’s about…”

Abby’s eyes widened and she nodded, turning to Murphy, “I’ll be back in a moment, sweetie.”

Elizabeth led Abby back up to the dormitories and kept her occupied with lies you made up together about you as you snuck into the common room.

“Psst.”

Murphy turned towards you in surprise.

“Let’s get out of here so we can talk without being interrupted,” you whisper.

He nods and follows you out of the common room, strolling through the hallways looking for an empty room to duck into where you won’t be found by Abby when it appears.

“What is…”

“Who cares?!  Get in!”

“Oh, this is cozy.”

Your face feels warm as you realize how close you’re standing to him.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?”

“I just wanted to apologize.  I’m sorry I said those things.  They’re not true!  I – I really miss having you at Quidditch matches…commentating.”

“Really?”

“Yeah…” you say sheepishly, “Tell me a statistic.”

Murphy’s face splits into a grin.  You can’t help but smile too.  He hasn’t smiled in months.

He reaches for your trembling hands with his.  At his touch, you feel a calm rush over you.

“There’s a 100% chance that I’m in love with you.”

You freeze.  You expected to be repulsed.  Afraid.  But all you feel is safe.

You drop to down so that you are eye level with him.

“I love you too,” you whisper back, barely audible.

Surprising yourself, you lean forward and kiss him on the nose.  As you pull away, you feel his hands leave yours, wrapping around you and pulling you in for a proper kiss.

“Y/N? Y/N!”

You snap yourself back to reality, looking at the photo in your hands, as your eyes filled with tears.

“Y/N, is everything okay?”

“I should’ve told you…all these years…I should’ve…done something.  And now…” you break down, your voice cracking, “You’re gone.”

He puts a hand on your chest, over your heart, “I will always be here.”